Adventure at the Lantern Festival

St. Martins Day

November 11 was St. Martin’s day here in Germany. Saint Martin was a Roman soldier in the early 4th century who was baptized as a christian and once cut his cloak in half to share with a beggar during a snowstorm. Here in Germany, it’s tradition for the children to walk in processions carrying lanterns and singing Martin songs. When they reach their destination Martin breads (pretzels) are handed out or cooked over the bonfire. I think the lanterns represent the light and hope that kindness to other can bring into our lives.

It is a really awesome holiday, and one which I didn’t know anything about until I showed up at Lucy’s school with four kids, a lantern with no light in it, and no stroller. I was expecting to find a nice spot to sit and watch the kids get some lights to put in their lanterns, but instead everyone had already provided their own lights and they were walking off into town!

Lucky for me, our bike lights are detachable so we tossed those into the lanterns, and I picked up the heavy car seat with the sleeping baby and off we went. We marched about a mile before my pride gave way and I called Ross to save me with the stroller. My back was hurting SO badly by the time he finally found us, and that took a while because we were one group of about five in that neighborhood who were all marching along their own route. He followed one group and then another until he finally located the poor, dumb immigrant who hadn’t thought to bring along a stroller on what turned into a 3 mile hike through the dark.

We had another shot a few days later when we had another lantern procession for David’s class. You can bet I brought along all the proper equipment!

Cuttings

This week, since I don’t have any commissions pending, I cut a couple of little birds and a celtic battle axe. I love the tiny wings! It reminds me of the bird feeders at my in-laws’ house and how their cat used to watch the birds with a hungry look on her face.

German

Last Monday morning, my friend Amanda and I visited our fantastic and formidable friend Freia for a German lesson. Freia was a school teacher for about 30 years and even in retirement she still has a real gift for teaching.

Today’s topic? Cases. In German there are four cases that appear differently based on the gender of the noun in the sentence. I really loved her example. Here it is in English…

The man was sitting at the railway. A friend took care of the man telling the man a lot of beautiful things, making the man laugh.

Easy enough, right?

Here it is auf Deutsch…

Der Mann saß in der Eisenbahn. Ein Freund nahm sich des Mannes an, erzählt dem Mann viele schöne Sachen und brachte dabei den Mann zum Lachen.

Much to my chagrin, there are an additional 12 options for the word “the” depending on the gender and age of the person sitting on the train track. Lucky for me, Freia is very patient! On the way home from her house, I snapped a picture of the river because it was so pretty.

Birthday!

In other news, Lucy is 5! She was so excited to be five and told absolutely everyone she met. She practiced saying “Today is my birthday” in German (“Heute ist mein Geburtstag”) for about 20 minutes as we walked to school, and she practically danced up the steps into her classroom to collect her birthday crown.

The birthday party was a hit. It was meant to be pretty small, but when the birthday girl invited her best friend Timmy she also made sure to invite his siblings, parents and grandparents. We moved it to the church because our apartment might explode with 10 guests.

For Ross and I, the day was hard. Ross ended up making a lot more food than he had planned as well as baking a cake (which was delicious) and cookies for her kindergarten. I was tired, spent the morning wrestling with fondant and, unbeknownst to me, was about to be bedridden with the flu. We did our level best to be cheerful though, and I don’t think our stress affected Lucy’s day. Between a quick video message to both sets of grandparents, a yellow and pink pony cake, a few gifts and lots of love coming in via messages from America, she was perfectly happy.

That night, after all the kids were asleep I went in and looked and my five year old and remembered her baby blessing. She was blessed to be “an angel to many” and I am really astonished at how true that has been. She has been our angel at the most interesting and challenging moments we have weathered. She was born back in Indiana in grad school when we really needed a sweet and lady like little baby to calm some of the storms that were brewing around us. Of course she has, since then, had many (many) moments of devilishness, but angel Lucy has popped up when we really needed it. She comes back with a kiss or a hug, a twirl in a pretty dress, a funny comment or question, an “I like you and you’re pretty”, or just a smile.

So happy birthday, little angel. I love you.

Ahh…My Old Schule House!

It’s been another month, so it’s time for another update from the Coughanours in Deutschland. This month the big adventure has been…School! Alice and David both started school at the beginning of August. Alice is in first grade and meets in the school building directly across the street from our apartment. David is in Kindergarten (which is basically preschool) and I ride with him to school which is about 5 blocks away.

First Grade

My favorite thing about the first grade in Germany is the Schultüte ceremony. A Schultüte is a large paper or plastic cone that is presented to the first grader who is about to embark on their school career. It is filled with little gifts and school supplies and candy. I had a lot of fun picking out and filling Alice’s school cone. Even if we move somewhere else, I’m definitely keeping this tradition for all the kids.

Alice LOVES her schultüte

The Saturday before the first day of school all of the first graders and their families gather in the auditorium for a presentation put on by all the older children in the school. Then, while the parents wait, the kids meet their teachers, they see their classroom and they get to know one another a bit.

This is a really blurry picture of the cute older students singing a song about how school doesn’t have to be scary to all the first graders.

Of course the hardest part about going to a German school is the German! The choice to put our kids in German schools rather than their international counterparts was very intentional, but this month has been an emotional roller coaster. I saw my little girl wiping away silent tears after she thought I had gone as she sat hunched over her desk in the middle of 20 little Jungen und Mädchen. My heart broke when I peeked through the school yard fence to see her playing by herself, surrounded by a sea of children who were playing near, but not with, her.

Just tonight, I attended a parent meeting at her school. I sat in her desk surrounded by the parents of her classmates who were talking and joking and understanding and I felt completely isolated. I felt anxious and stressed and embarrassed. I feel like I understand what she is going through a little more. So tonight I am making a promise to myself. No matter what happens during my day, I will be a safe haven for my little girl at the end of hers.

In spite of the heart breaking moments there are so many victories every day. She walks to her class by herself and she comes home happily. She has made a few friends. She played with some girls in the playground today. She was able to tell a boy that she understands “ein bischen Deutsch” and he understood her. The triumphs are small but they are so so important and they come faster and faster.

Kindergarten

Literally “Child-garden”, Kindergarten in Germany is full of outside play. There is a very minimal structured curriculum (as far as I can tell, the only really structured time is a 15 minute circle time at the beginning of the day). Other than that, the children play. They play and play and play. This is the prefect environment for David to learn German. Already he knows German words without thinking about them in English.

“What’s all over your hands David?” I ask

“Oh…” he replies non-nonchalantly “It’s Kleber”

“What color do you want to wear?” I ask

“Blau of course” he says.

“See you later, buddy!” I say

“Bis Später!” he calls back.

Of course he has his challenges as well. He gets lonely and bored sometimes and he sometimes sits in the window for several minutes at a time waiting for me to come back and get him, but I’m not worried. He has very sweet and patient teachers. I absolutely love his adorable Polish born teacher who says in her heavy accent “Oh! He is so nice! I just like him!” as she tousles his hair (which makes him blush and duck his head with a coy little smile).

Dave loves to ride his balance bike to school. He’s pretty fast!

Homeschool 

Lucy is at home with me. This is unusual for a 3 year old in Germany. Many children start attending Kindergarten at 1 year and prenatal registration is a must. I wouldn’t mind sending Lucy to school but while enrollment is free for 5 year old children there is a cost for the younger ones. In the mean time she helps me with laundry and tidying, she is learning to be independent, she keeps me company with ceaseless adorable babbling about this or that thing, and we go to parks.

One of her favorite things to do is climb the 4 flights of stairs to the attic where we hang our laundry on rainy days. It is old and strange and exciting up there and she plays out her fantasies with gusto.

And now…Grownup Classes! 

This week I’ll be starting an adult German class which is offered at Alice’s school with babysitting provided! I’m so excited to improve my language skills. More on that later.

Pictures

Here are a bunch of pictures I’ve taken recently…

Headed to church

At Alice’s School.

Headed off to School in the morning

Date with mom

I like this tiny person.

 

First Impressions

It has been a whole month since we moved to Germany. I have really been shirking my blog writing goals but things are going very well. It is so nice to live together as a family again! We have been setting up house, exploring the city and getting to know our neighbors.

Here are some of my favorite things about our new life.

Ross

I am so happy to be living together again! Change has been the watchword of the month in almost everything, but being together again and figuring out how we work as a couple again has been wonderful and familiar. We sing to the kids at night, we play catch, Ross writes while I draw or cut, we explore, we play, we work. It is wonderful to be able to talk to each other in person.

Out on a bike ride together.

We have been figuring out how to be parents together again too. I think parents tend to go through a re-training period about semi-annually when it comes to the rearing of their children. When you add an international move and a reunion to the mix it enhanced that adjustment period for us. The transition from single parent to co-parent can be a challenge, but it is a remarkably good one to take on.

Visitors

We’ve really enjoyed hosting a few guests during the first few weeks after the move. My mom and dad helped us make the journey over here and then they stayed with us for the first week and a half. We did lots of biking and walking and exploring with them. My mom helped me do a little decorating and dad helped Ross put together our new cargo bike. It was a great visit and we were all very sad to see them go.

Mom and dad at the zoo with us.

About a week later our good friend Ryne came for a visit as part of his European tour. He and two friend were great to hang out with and I hope they had a fun time traveling all over the place.

Ryne is fun.

Church

Coming to Europe, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect from the ward here. Whatever preconceptions or fears I had about how we would be received were put to rest on the very first Sunday. Our ward is incredibly welcoming. Lots of people have been offering to help translate for me, the kids felt right at home in primary, and there is a real sense of inclusion that I hadn’t really expected.

Our ward area includes Braunschweig and 2 neighboring towns. Luckily for us, Ross found us an apartment that is less than a 5 minute bike ride from the church down a picturesque little bike path. Our Sunday morning ride to the chapel is one of my favorite moments of the week.

There are three other expat families in the ward. Two of them are from the states and the other family is from Mexico. It has been very nice to have a group of women who know what it is like to move here from overseas. They have been anticipating my questions and concerns, they have been giving my really wonderful advice and (most importantly to me) making me feel very very welcome.

There are 2 full time elder missionaries and 2 full time sister missionaries in our area and they have been very helpful in our initial transition. Ross has gone out teaching with the elders a few times and the sisters have been kind enough to come over once a week to help me with my German.

The Cargo Bike

Our new cargo bike is awesome. I love that I can buckle all three kids in and still have room for a stroller or a back pack. I also really like that I can see them all while we are riding around. It comes with a full rain cover (which is good for this area) that has clear vinyl windows and can be pulled back when the weather is nice.

At the duck pond.

During our first week, we took the family on an outing in the new bike and little L, who was still jet lagged from the trip fell fast asleep. She didn’t wake up when we unbuckled her and stowed her underneath the bench. She hasn’t done that since, but it’s good to know that she fits (more or less).

Sleeping in the cargo bike is a squishy affair.

The city is very bike friendly. Bike lanes are the norm, there are bike racks in front of every store, and there are beautiful secluded bike paths all over the city. We get a fair amount of attention out on the street (most of it friendly). Though bikes are extremely common, cargo bikes are rare, and three children to a family is also pretty uncommon. Yesterday we took the bikes to the city center and played in the splash pad. The kids had a spectacular time.

The splash pad at the city center ran the water for about 30 seconds and then turned it off for a minute or two, so most of the playing was done in the aftermath of the fountains.

Cobblestones pave most of the streets in the inner ring of the city.

I think they had more fun because it was impromptu and there were no swimsuits required.

Sehenswürdigkeiten  (The sights)

We live in a really stunning part of the world. Braunschweig is so green! The only place I can really compare it to is south-central Indiana except that it is a bit milder and wetter here. There are playgrounds all over the place. One of my favorites is on the bank of the Oker river next to a bike path. Almost all the playground equipment is built from the branches of local trees. There are tree houses, a ship built on large springs so that it feels like its really moving, a swing set, a slide and a suspended teeter-totter. What makes it even better is that it is secluded enough that hardly anyone is ever there! It is surrounded on three sides by thick German forest.

 

Moments before this picture he fell and hit his head. He’s a pretty resilient little guy.

Pirates in a storm.

I love this face!

They love the teeter-totter in this beautiful secluded little park.

She learned to pump last year and now she’s a pro.

The city center (innenstadt) is old and lovely. The cathedrals and castle and courthouse look like they are straight out of the middle ages. Now, during the summer vacation, we will often come across farmers markets and street vendors and performers milling around between beautiful huge buildings that have been standing for 800 years or more.

Lion square. Braunchweig is known as the Lion City in reference to Heinrich the Lion, duke of Saxony who died here in 1195.

Mom and dad in front of the Opera house.

Our Apartment

We live 5 minutes outside of the Innenstadt in an old 5 story building directly across the street from the elementary school. Ross had already done a LOT of work on the apartment before we arrived and in the month since I have had fun putting a few feminine touches on the place.

Ross hung these two floating shelves next to the bed for nightstands.

I have been doing yoga in the mornings and I love to stretch in front of these big windows in our room.

One of my favorite areas in our apartment is the big dining room and living room. They are brightly lit from the windows from about 4:30 in the morning to almost 10 at night. I’ve heard that during the winter it is dark most of the time, so I’m enjoying all the sunshine.

Forts have been a weekly occurrence around here as the kids are trying to make their mark on the new house.

Ross’s corner. He sits here and plays guitar for half an hour at a time.

My kitchen is small and sweet and European. I actually really like having the washing machine in the kitchen because I can multitask my housework. My mom bought some herbs for the window sill that I love! And dad picked up a little drawer tower to put next to the washer. It is such an efficient little kitchen and it feels homey and sweet.

Had I taken this picture during the day, you could see our courtyard out the window.

The table was one of Ross’s awesome finds. It has leaves on both sides that slide out for more counter space.

The stove has a tidy little cover that keeps everything clean and safe for the kids.

A fun quirk of the house is that there are two half bathrooms. The toilet room comes off the hall, and the tub room door is in the kitchen. Kinda funny, but it works.

I am excited to write more about our adventures soon, but I’ve got to stop for tonight. We miss our family and friends very much and we will try to keep our ties with America strong.

Auf Wiedersehen from Braunschweig!

Migrating

We are here! More about ‘here’ later. This post is about the trip itself – of which I’m so relieved to be on the other side of.  The travelers included myself, the three children and my mom and dad. There were a handful of tender mercies that made everything work out in the end and helped me feel like our Heavenly Father is mindful of us.

The morning of the 20th was extremely busy. It is hard to ever be truly completely packed when there are four people still trying to wear the clothes that need to be put in the suitcases.  Since naked travel is generally frowned upon, I was washing clothes and repacking up until the day of departure when 4 pairs of unwashed underwear was shoved, without ceremony, into outside pockets of suitcases. When the suitcases were finally packed and loaded into the car and everyone had found a seat, my dad asked me for the car keys. The keys! I knew I had had them last, but I had no idea where they were. On the way inside, I said a quick prayer and then immediately thought to look on my mom’s sewing desks. I was back to the car in under a minute, having found the keys under a pile of fallen fabric behind the sewing machine. First tender mercy of the day.

Our total number of bags for this trip was 15. 3 checked bags (15kg), 2 large carry-on, 1 guitar, 3 child-size suitcases and 6 personal items (backpacks and purses). Within seconds of leaving the car at the Salt Lake Airport, one of the child suitcases broke and couldn’t be rolled for the rest of the trip. My in-laws came see us off which was really nice.

In the cockpit with captain Dave

Checking bags and going through security in Salt Lake was painless and the first flight went off without a hitch. Nana had given my little 5 year old a pilot uniform and hat which he wore at the airport and on the plane. The pilot invited the kids into the cockpit and they got to sit in his chair.

A weird beaver statue in Canada

Vancouver Airport was great. It was very organized. It was comfortable. We had lunch we waited for our plane and got some rest while the kids played in the handy play area. Then, we were off again.

Playing Pirates in Vancouver

Pretending to chess in Vancouver

During the 9 hour flight to Manchester, our recently potty trained 3rd child had no accidents at all. There were no fits or fights,  everyone got at least a couple hours of sleep and when we landed and were asked to donate all of our spare change to Canadian children.

I refuse to stand in line… I will only wiggle!

I’m sure Manchester is a very nice place, but to me it will always be the home of 4 hot humid headachey horendous hours. Heat and long cues made for tantrums and fights and with no ramp to our last plane, I carried a sleeping toddler and 40lbs of luggage down 4 flights of stairs, onto the tarmac and up to a very narrow very full plane. The last two hours in the air were half dozing half urging children to follow suit.

I’ve forgotten how to smile mother… Is this it?

Berlin on the other hand might be the most beautiful city in the world because that is where I saw Ross again. Once we found each other I felt complete and happy and (in a purely practical note) less heavy laden.

It’s better when we’re together

We walked from the airport to the train station in the time you would expect 4 tired adults and 3 TIRED children to walk to a train station. Our train was full of exceedingly quiet German business people…and one loud American family. The bus we caught when we arrived was full of quiet Braunschweig locals…and one loud American family.

We walked the last 3 blocks (were honked at for walking in the bike lane) up a flight of stairs, and finally arrived at our new home in Braunschweig, Germany.

Goodbye

It is the night before the move and I feel like we are about to step off a cliff and hope for water at the bottom. The last few days have been so emotional for me. It has been a year full of family and friends and familiar places and now we are leaving it behind. 

I am thrilled to go on this adventure with my best friend and my sweet babies! I can’t really imagine what is in store but its going to be amazing. I’m excited to see new things and experience the world in a new way. But I’m still scared. 

I hope that most of my future posts will be full of optimism but tonight I feel like I need to spend a minute being sad for what we will miss. 

Mom hugs and dad talks. 

Games with good friends. 

Watching the kids play with their cousins. 

Kitchen conversations with women I love. 

Familiar mountains. 

Music classes. 

Friendly conversations with strangers in English. 

Popu’s scripture stories. 

Warm dinner rolls made just so. 

Sisters. 

High school plays. 

Conversations with my mom. Real conversations with touch and look and body language and sometimes tears and hugs at the end. 

Fathers blessings. 

Reading along in church and understanding what is being said. 

Knowing my children are confident and happy.

Recent goodbyes have left me feeling the loss of what we are leaving and I am forever grateful for the time we had in Utah (and before that in Indiana). It has been a remarkable year with wonderful people; one that I will not soon forget. 

Cacophonous Cognates

We are emigrating! Ross got a job at the state theater in Brunswick, Germany. In an increasingly difficult job market we are so grateful that he has been hired as an opera singer. He will be doing something he loves and we will be able to stay together as a family.

Braunschweig is in former West Germany about 2 hours from Berlin. The City Center is surrounded by the Oker river. The Theater is next to the river on the east of the Innenstadt (city center) and is surrounded by a really beautiful park.

The theater is beautiful. Like every Staatstheater it is owned by the state (in this case the state of Lower Saxony). Their spring shows include Sweeny Todd, Aladin, Alice in Wonderland, My Fair Lady, Romeo and Juliet, Wozzeck, symphonies, concerts, and a bunch of other shows that are in German and I didn’t recognize

. 

It all feels a little surreal. My to do list is overwhelming…but also invisible. Often, I’m not sure what to do or what order to do it in but right now one of my top priorities is to learn German.

Ross is more or less fluent. He took 4 years of German in college, he has about 4 months in country, he watched German movies with English subtitles, used apps, listened to audio books and used flashcards. He has been really helpful and he thinks I’ll learn fast if not as fast as the kids. It will be great to have him there.

In high school I took Spanish, but I didn’t try hard and didn’t progress very far. At this point, I’m spending about an hour a day on a bevy of German language apps. I think I might actually be able to pull this off, but its going to take a whole lot of work. I’ve got vocabulary floating around my head all day long and in the mean time I’m trying to wrap my mind around day to day life. If I could take time off every day to study uninterrupted I might be little less distracted, but that’s just not what my life looks like right now. Moving, downsizing, learning a new language, meeting up with friends before we leave, planning a farewell concert, helping the kids finish up the school year, laundry, chauffeuring, cleaning, organizing, mothering…its all smashed together in my brain. It is overpowering sometimes but its also exciting!

I think I’ll keep writing this blog in English. 😉